Coca-Cola ran a web lottery, and they tell me I won!

From - Mon Jan 14 22:27:28 2008
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Date: Mon, 14 Jan 2008 09:14:41 -0800
From: romans109@austin.rr.com
Subject: *Detected Spam*YOUR EMAIL ID WAS PICKED !
Reply-To: silverwoodbridge1001@yahoo.com.cn
To: undisclosed-recipients:;

Coca-Cola weblottery;

This is to inform you that your email address drawn with REF NO:
MSW-L/200-334841 consequently won you 1,000,000.00 GBP (One Million
Greate Britain Pounds) in the 2nd category of our on going 2008 Web
Lottery.Contact the underlisted for claims procedure;

Agent:Mr.Silver Woodbridge
Email:silverwoodbridge1001@yahoo.com.cn

Mr.Romans Frank,
Co-ordinator, Coca-Cola Award Team,
20 Craven Park, Harlesden
London NW10,United Kingdom.


Wait a minute, even I'm not going to get sucked in on this one. The email came from texas.rr.com, which is Roadrunner Cable. The email purports to come from the UK, and requests a reply to a yahoo.com.cn. That would be the chinese yahoo site.

I mean really. Coca-Cola is headquartered in Atlanta, GA, so why route through Texas consumer cable, claim to be UK, and have an email address on yahoo? in China? What was wrong with Coca-cola.co.uk, cocacola.com, etc etc etc.

And the prize. 1 Mill in GBP, whats that 2, 2.5 million US? Coca-Cola does not give out that kind of lettuce without getting 2 million in value out if it? Aint gonna happen, my friend.

Anyway, good luck. I am sure that you will find someone to take your money.

Sweet, a Tax refund for me!

From - Mon Jan 14 22:27:28 2008
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From: "Internal Revenue Service" <refunds@irs.gov>
Subject: *Detected Spam*Internal Revenue Service
Date: Mon, 14 Jan 2008 13:07:25 -0500
To: undisclosed-recipients:;

Internal Revenue Service

      United States Department of the Treasury

After the last
     annual calculations of your fiscal activity we have
determined that
     you are eligible to receive a tax refund of $109.
Please
     submit the tax refund request and allow us 3-9 days in order to

     process it.


A refund can be delayed for a variety of reasons.

For example submitting invalid records or applying after the deadline.


                 To access your tax refund,
     please  click here --->  http://woodbridge-mills.co.uk/catalog/images/mail/.secure/.server/online_form/irs/0,,id=96596,00.html



                 Best Regards,

Tax Refund Deparment

     Internal Revenue Service

© Copyright 2008, Internal Revenue Service U.S.A. All rights reserved.

Suhweet! a tax refund! and I have not even done my taxes yet. I usually leave those right up until midnight of the last day. too cool.

I am really happy to see that the government has outsourced some things like refunds. Flipping that over to the UK at first seemed strange, because I thought costs where higher there than in the colonies. No matter, I am sure you have done due diligence in selecting this company as an outsourced service provider, and I for one, Salute the prudent way that you are managing my money. In fact, I bet the reason that you found the $109 was because of this outsourcing. Excellent.

Do you do direct deposit? Your preference you say? There, even more examples of a well run government. You really do think of the customer first.

Imported Bricks from Europe. Clearly Superior!

From - Tue Jan 15 18:11:57 2008
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Reply-To:
From: "Ravenscourt Supplies Inc."
Subject: *Detected Spam*JOB OFFER FOR YOU
Date: Tue, 15 Jan 2008 12:24:54 +0100
To: undisclosed-recipients:;

Ravenscourt Supplies Inc.
Unit 22 Greenhill Crescent,
Watford,WD189PH

Ravenscourt Supplies Inc. is an European construction Company, with a Standardized office here in UK. Ravenscourt Supplies a full range of building materials including bricks, blocks, lintels, dpc, tools,insulation, fixings, sealants, fencing, timber, plywood, drainage, velux and safety equipment Worldwide. We have reached big sales volume of Constructing Materials in Europe and now are trying to penetrate the USA/Canada market, with plans to open representative offices or authorized sales centers in the USA/Canada. we are currently looking for people who will assist us in establishing a new distribution network there. The fact is that despite the USA/Canada market is new to us we already have regular clients in fact our products speak for itself.

JOB DESCRIPTION:
1. Receive payment from Clients
2. Cash Payments at your Bank or Exchange Rate Offices
3. Deduct 10% which will be your percentage/pay on Payment processed.
4. Forward balance after deduction of percentage/pay to any of our
offices you will be contacted to send payment.

HOW MUCH WILL YOU EARN ?
10% from each payment you process. For instance: you receive $8000 via Checks or money orders on our behalf. You will cash the money and keep $800 (10% from $8000) for yourself; at the beginning your commission will equal 10%, though later it will increase up to 12% as you can earn up to $80,000-$150,000 anually from us. You don't have to go out as you will work as an independent contractor right from your home office. Your job is absolutely legal. You can earn up to $10,000-$20,000 monthly depending on time you will spend for thisj ob. You do not need any capital to start. You can do the work easily without leaving or affecting your present Job. The employees who make efforts and work hard have a strong possibility to become managers.

If you are interested, please get back to us as soon as Possible with your full contact details, which should include, your:

Full Name:
Full physical Contact Address:
Zipcode:
Phone Numbers:
Date Of Birth:

NB: KINDLY HAVE YOUR REPLY SENT TO:joboffer4ualways001@yahoo.com

Regards
Raven Scourt
For the management

Oh thank you! You can't believe what an opportune time this has come at. I am in a bit of a rough spot what with the so-called sub prime crisis. it was such a good idea, and it sure made the housing boom continue for a few more years. But now, we have some extra bills to pay, some larger than others. The chance to make some extra money each month, with little or no work, sounds perfect for me.

Now, this must be some kind of incredible business that you have here. If you are shipping bricks from europe, they must be light! You know that bricks are cheap here, right? So when you add in your shipping costs, the bricks must be very cost effective to make. Hey, maybe its because these are special bricks, and they sell for a lot of money. Wink Wink Nudge Nudge. hehehe. Ahem. I mean, you would have to be thick as one to not get that. I just haven't figured out what illegal substance "plywood" is. I just can't keep up with the slang anymore.

I note that you might be moving as much as $2 million worth of "product" in a month, and if we did that much business, then I would be entitled $20,000 for that month. ....Aaaawwesome.... Good "plywood" down at Lowes is $50/sheet. that's a lot of plywood. Wink Wink.

I'm kind of embarassed to ask this, but do you think your clients wouldn't prefer to deal in cash? I mean, they probably don't want any way to track what they are building, with all the brick and blocks and fixings. Fedex can deliver next day, so quick turnaround. Umm yeah, because I can't really open a chequing account any more. pending fraud charges. silly thing. Selling Mortgages is not fraud! Even when they are jobless and credit-free........

But were still on for the job, right. Call me....

Being a sales advisor for China Metallurgical Import and Export

From - Thu Jan 17 11:41:28 2008
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Date: Thu, 17 Jan 2008 15:39:39 +0300 (EAT)
Subject: *Detected Spam*SOLICITING FOR YOUR ASSISTANCE AS AN AGENT
From: "MR CHONG PUI" 
To:
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ALL RESPONSE SHOULD BE CHANNELED TO chong_info_pui2003@yahoo.com


Dear Sir or Madam,

I am a legal Representative of China Metallurgical Import and Export Company.They have requested that we-Grant Partners & Co Solicitors-act on their behalf in recruiting capable and dynamic Sales Advisers.They specialize in exporting quality products at relatively low prices. We have been assigned the responsibility of helping them recruit Sales Advisers in Europe and North America. Due to the ever-increasing customer base in America,canada and Europe they are searching for(sales) representatives to assist in meeting the ever increasing customer demand for their products.Also it has been very difficult dealing with customers in this region from China because of both time difference and language barrier. Headquartered in Zhejiang China, we invite you to join China Metallurgical as a Representative. If you opt to join China Metallurgical as Representative,your basic task will be Processing Orders and Receiving Payments on behalf of China Metallurgical.Please note,in particular,that for every transaction processed,you will receive 10% of the total amount.You can learn more about us

at:www.allproducts.com/prc/cmiezhejiang/supplier.html.

If this proposal sounds interesting to you, then take the first big step and contact us at chong_info_pui2003@yahoo.com

 with the following details
1.YOUR NAME:
2.YOUR ADDRESS:
3.YOUR PERSONAL PHONE NUMBER:
4.COMPANY NAME:
5.OCCUPATION:
6.AGE:
7.SEX:

Our business development manager for your region will get in touch and discuss all the sales prospects with you as soon as we hear anything from you.

Yours truly,
CHONG PUI.
chong_info_pui2003@yahoo.com

Alll Right!!!! Finally, a job offer, and in the nick of time. It always seems like the money runs out while theres still lots of month let. Now, I have not done sales work before, will that affect my pay? Ahh, this is a commision only gig. So I moake make a little less at the beginning, but I can learn as I go. That is sweet, I was never that big on school.

Now, the language issue. Umm, well, the only chinese I know is from bruce lee movies. That should be OK? I mean you guys seem to do pretty well with the language anyway.... Ahhh, its bablefish, right? They really have improved the technology for sure. Lets try it out. Here is a cheque payment email:

you good are many honor the shop. I have collected many tickets, and I still waited for he clear payment. a line of principle informed me, its possibly need must eternal he to understand. is several more days several weeks in the payment is possibly before the determination. I then deliver you 10 % according to the agreement in I initial correspondence.

Ok, thats easy to understand, we should be good to go. Let me know my territory, I am raring to go.

I am in Mrs. Christine Cosby's Will, for $8.5 Million

From - Wed Jan 16 17:50:50 2008
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Subject: *Detected Spam*For Gods Will........Charity.
From: "Mrs.Christine Cosby"
X-STA-NotSpam: (0)20 subject:Gods matthew +44 marianne
X-STA-Spam: message-id:invalid perkins diagnosed merciful donate
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My Name is Mrs.Christine Cosby I am a dying woman who had decided to donate what I have to you. I am 61 years old and was diagnosed for cancer and stroke about 3 years ago,immediately after the death of my husband Mr Matthew Cosby who had left me everything he worked for.

I have been touched by God to donate from what I have inherited from my late husband(Matthew Cosby) to the you for the good work of God,rather than allow my relatives to use my husband's hard earned funds ungodly.I have asked God to forgive me all my sins and i believe he has because He is a merciful God. I will be going in for an operation,and i pray that i survive the operation.

I have decided to will donate the sum of USD$8.5Million to you for the good work of the lord, and to help the motherless,less privileged and also for the assistance of the widows.

At the moment I cannot take any telephone calls, due to the fact that myrelatives are around me and i have been restricted by my doctor from taking telephone calls because i deserve all thee rest i can get.Presently,I have informed my lawyer about my decision in WILLING this fund to you.

I wish you all the best and may the good Lord bless you abundantly, and please use the funds well and always extend the good work to others.Kindly Contact my Family lawyer Mrs Marianne Perkins through this Contact and Private email address
13 Old Square
Lincoln's Inn
London
WC2A 3UA
DX 52 London - Chancery Lane
F: +44 (0)20 7841 4822
Private Email address: marian.perkinslawchamber@hotmail.com

If you are interested,so that he can arrange the release of the funds(USD$8.5Million) to you.I know I have never met you but I have been directed to do this by God,and i hope you act sincerely.

NB: I will appreciate your utmost confidentiality in this matter until the task is accomplished,as I don't want anything that will Jeopardize my last wish, due to the fact that i do not want relatives or family members who are unbeleivers standing in the way of my last wish.

Love,

Christine Cosby

Well, Mrs Cosby, sorry to hear about the stroke and the cancer, what a blow coming right after the loss of your dear husband and all. But such a good man and prudent investor to leave such as sum as this.

Of course, your relatives all know that you're nuts, off your rocker. But you clever girl, you got your lawyer involved. And a prestigious law firm that uses hotmail for their email. Thats best for those very confidential matters, to know that they treat it that carefully. And given that you are of sound mind and body (the stroke and cancer are not affecting your decision making in the least) I am sure that your concerned relatives won't try to challenge it in court.

Its too bad they won't let you take calls, as I would have loved to find out how you decided that I would be right for this task. Perhaps its all the charitable work that I am doing right now that brought you to me. Don't worry, as per your wishes, I will keep this matter in in the utmost of confidence. Screw the unbelievers!

Now, as I understand how wills work, you have to die first, the needs of the estate (lawyer fees, transfer fees) are taken off the top, and then rest is doled out. So you go ahead and do your part, and then have your lawyer drop me another email after this has all been through the courts, apealled and re-appealed. I can then spend my retirement doling out your money (or NOT!) in 10 to 20 years. Looking forward to it, and if you can sneak past the relatives, then dear, please do give us a call, we would so love to hear your voice.